Don’t Be That Guy

Everyone knows what I refer to when I say “That Guy”. You can spot him from a mile away – douchey, cocky, whatever other adjectives you want to include.

But what I’m going to talk about is a whole new breed of That Guy, and he pisses me off more than any other guy out there. He’s that guy on the bus who takes up more than one seat and knows he’s doing it. The usual acceptable standard is that you can take up two seats when the bus is less full. This generally leaves one seat between you and the person next to you, and in the unfortunate case that the bus gets more full, then you are willing to move and create a space for a person desperate for a seat.

But That Guy, will make it perfectly clear that he’s not moving for anyone. He’s claimed his two seats and he’s going to enjoy his space. Like today, there was a guy on the bus, reading the school newspaper, sitting in the MIDDLE OF TWO FUCKING SEATS, with his murse on the side of him. His legs crossed, perfectly content with what he was doing and totally unaware to his surroundings. He made no acknowledgment to the three guys standing in the doorway wondering if he was going to give up the seat next to him. The smug look on his face made me want to get up and make it awkward for him as I tried to sit in the spot next to him.

Really that’s the only solution to defeat That Guy on the Bus, is to force him to give up his seat. Then he will be miserable and you will gain the satisfaction of stopping a douche from ruining someone else’s day.

There’s a variation of That Guy – and I guess we can call it Those Girls, they generally sit at the back of the bus (here in Victoria, there are 5 seats at the back going perpendicular to the road, and then another 5 seats which are parallel to the road. (See Image below) In the picture if you turn seats 22 and 8 (on the left hand side of the picture) 90 degrees, you will get the layout of the buses here.So moving on, Those Girls generally like to sit at the back, and have as much space to themselves, putting their feet up and such. I have been in a situation where 3 of these aforementioned girls were taking up a total of 7 seats. Which is only one above the given 2 seat per person, but it was their formation that made the entire back of the bus uncomfortable for any other riders. With a girl in each back corners and then one on one of the sides, it makes sitting somewhere in that region a death sentence.

I spend a lot of my time on buses and do my best to be as nice as possible to other people. But there’s always going to be That Guy somewhere. Maybe one day I’ll have to take some kind of action…


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